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I’m really considering going to a meditation retreat or at least attend a meditation class. I think that I’m the kind of person who could really benefit from it.

02:46 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

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I’m not the type of person who can just sit here and watch. I am always going to try and think of a solution or an alternative. I feel so infuriated when someone stops me from doing that. My opinions are my own and you don’t have to agree with them, but at least let me give my two cents before you assume I don’t know anything.

01:17 am, BY lisaplvu[3 notes]

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Different mentalities make people grow apart. The friends you made years ago might not be as compatible with you now. You might have differing levels of ambition or a conflicting set of values with them. But just because you grow apart does not mean you can’t be friends when it really matters. There will just be more times when you’ll want to rip each other’s brains out… and that’s okay as long as it’s out of love.

10:14 pm, BY lisaplvu

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I know it’s possible to be with someone who is just so into you. I see it all the time. So why is it that I can’t feel that way? It’s kind of a sick feeling when half the time you feel entangled in love and then the other half you feel like you’re never going to be that person who makes them feel genuinely interested in your opinions, your beliefs, and your life. Being me just doesn’t cut it anymore. I don’t even know what I’m doing. I just have a feeling that I’m never going to be that person no matter how much I care. I’m never going to be the reason to motivate someone. No matter how much emotion is behind the words I say, they always sound empty to someone else. This is something I will never understand because they’re afraid to hurt my feelings. Of course they’re going to say, “noo, you do motivate me. I know you care about me so much,” but it’s never believable. Actions make it believable. I’ve seen what it’s like for two people to truly make each other feel the most comfortable, the most secure, and the most trusted. I want that so badly.

10:57 pm, BY lisaplvu[2 notes]

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So fucking immature.

12:14 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

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Don’t be fooled. What people don’t realize is that I’m never smiling on the inside.

Don’t be fooled. What people don’t realize is that I’m never smiling on the inside.

03:16 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

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True friends are the ones who don’t keep tabs on each other of who tries to keep in touch more. True friends are the ones who don’t need to talk everyday, every week, or even every month, but know that the other one is thinking about them all the time. True friends are the ones who can easily pick up where they left off no matter how much time has passed. True friends are the ones who always know the right things to say. True friends love each other like family. True friends understand how busy life can be. True friends appreciate each other. True friends know the meaning of brutal honesty in the best regard. True friends can never be replaced. True friends are a rarity, so when you find one, make sure they know it.

10:47 pm, BY lisaplvu[3 notes]

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I wish I didn’t have to go through another long distance relationship. *sigh* But the things we do for love…

01:03 am, BY lisaplvu[3 notes]

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That’s it. There goes my sanity. It’s gone out the window. But I refuse to lose my integrity and my congeniality.

Social media is always flooding with articles on what twenty-something-year-olds should or shouldn’t be doing and I’ve seen this token of advice several times: “Don’t burn bridges,” or “Mend your broken bridges.” I personally have a much better peace of mind when I do break off relationships with people who hurl so much negativity into my life. And this isn’t something I do after one instance. I choose to do so only after I’ve meditated on the relationship over countless moments. Some people are just better off ruining other people’s lives and not mine. There is no way that I will ever let anyone destroy who I am. If everyone supposedly gets what they deserve, then I don’t deserve that.

I’ve decided to stay somewhere else for a while, at least through to finals week. I honestly can’t be here right now. I don’t care if he thinks he’s won. He’s already lost all of my respect. So instead of succumbing to this hostility, I’m just going to leave. Good luck to everyone else in this house. Mom will be absent for a while.

10:31 am, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

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I seriously cannot wait until the end of July. This is the only home that I have and it’s exhausting trying to keep my cool when I have to be here everyday while someone discharges their passive aggressiveness all over the house. Grow up and stop making excuses for your indecency. I am known as the fucking witch in this house because of you, because of your childish antics. I honestly cannot live here in peace with you. I try so hard to maintain a clean house and it’s impossible when you refuse to do your part. I don’t even know if you leave your stuff everywhere because you’re lazy or because you’re so bitter and passive aggressive. Either way, it doesn’t do anything but make you unwanted. You literally behave like a kid. I’m seriously so tired of it.

10:21 pm, BY lisaplvu[2 notes]

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Why is it so damn difficult to stop being self-conscious?! Sometimes I wish I was a dude so that I wouldn’t care about having boobs.

12:26 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

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Yeah, this sucks. Long distance is coming sooner than expected.

08:54 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]