Am I really that strange for not having a single care in the world for smoking weed? I’ve never been curious enough to try it and my opinion is not going to change unless I develop disease that would be relieved by it. Recreational weed smoking is honestly a turn-off to me, so why would I do it myself? I hate the smell and I can’t even handle the secondhand smoke, so why would I want it directly in my system? I don’t care how many people tell me that I should try it at least once. It seriously does not matter to me. I don’t care how many people tell me that I’m not open-minded because I won’t try it. My brain is just fine without it. I don’t care if you agree with me or not. You do your thing and I’ll do mine.

11:09 pm, BY lisaplvu[3 notes]


I haven’t cried in over 2 weeks! This is progress!

10:21 pm, BY lisaplvu


I’m trying to work on building my self-confidence. First step: learn to accept compliments.

11:26 pm, BY lisaplvu[2 notes]


I’m definitely in a much better place now than I was a week ago. It feels good! I think a crucial part of the turnaround was getting the negative energy out of this house. You wouldn’t believe how much nicer our house is now without all that mess and B.S. I feel like I can call this place “home” again, where I’m appreciated and don’t have to deal with the passive aggressiveness that was bringing my spirits down. I’m just so thankful for the people I have kept in my life and the ones who keep me in theirs, and I’m thankful that I still have another year to build wonderful memories in this home.

11:45 pm, BY lisaplvu


1) A boy telling you you’re pretty won’t make you see the beauty in the fullness of your cheeks, in redness of your lips at 2 in the morning when tequila is making the bar bathroom spin. He can’t take away the ugliness that you see in yourself, you have to do that.

2) You have to be ready to hear someone say they love you. You have to be ready, and you have to be willing, and you have to listen. Because sometimes, they won’t say those three words, they’ll put a blanket over you while you’re watching a movie, they’ll kiss your cheek when they think you’re asleep, they’ll smile when they see you first thing in the morning. But you, you have to be willing to see it, feel it, let it in. Letting someone love you takes practice.

3) Don’t make compromises you can’t live with. Compromise is a different version of what you want, not a whole other Universe.

4) Learn to say no. No - to a movie you don’t want to watch; no - to sex you don’t want to have, no- to a relationship that’s driving you mad. Say no - to things that hurt you, to people that extinguish your fire, to jobs you hate and places that are desolate. There are bad things that we can’t control, bad things that happen and we are sucked into and have to feel with every fibre of our being, but the rest - learn to distance yourself, learn to say no.

5) Don’t expect people to walk through fire for you - not your parents, not your friends, not the person you’re in love with. Love doesn’t mean sacrifice, love shouldn’t mean sacrifice. Don’t expect someone to give away pieces of them, so they could fit you better. And don’t feel hurt when they refuse to - it’s self-preservation. Instead - learn from them. Do it as well.

6) Don’t tether yourself to people. Learn to make connections, to love, with both your feet steady on the ground. Learn to let people pass through your life; like a summer breeze, not a storm that’s just been unleashed.

7) Learn the difference between growth and growing up before it’s too late. Rooftops and water fights and ice cream for breakfast can be a part of your life at 10, 25, or 35. But by the time you’re 35 you need to learn to say enough, to be able to walk away, you need to be able to love yourself. Love yourself the way you loved yourself at 10, before the world had a chance to fill your head with ugliness.

m.v., The list of things I learned before turning 22, pt.1. (via findingwordsforthoughts)

(via djxcl)

11:16 pm, BY lisaplvu[40,621 notes]


I started procrastinating on Tumblr (of course) and decided to flip back to some of my older posts. Everything I read from exactly a year ago is everything that I’ve been thinking now. I’ve definitely relapsed and this time I can’t blame it on the birth control. Maybe it’s the weather? I don’t know. Life is so complicated.

10:01 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]


I’m really considering going to a meditation retreat or at least attend a meditation class. I think that I’m the kind of person who could really benefit from it.

02:46 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]


I’m not the type of person who can just sit here and watch. I am always going to try and think of a solution or an alternative. I feel so infuriated when someone stops me from doing that. My opinions are my own and you don’t have to agree with them, but at least let me give my two cents before you assume I don’t know anything.

01:17 am, BY lisaplvu[3 notes]


Different mentalities make people grow apart. The friends you made years ago might not be as compatible with you now. You might have differing levels of ambition or a conflicting set of values with them. But just because you grow apart does not mean you can’t be friends when it really matters. There will just be more times when you’ll want to rip each other’s brains out… and that’s okay as long as it’s out of love.

10:14 pm, BY lisaplvu


I know it’s possible to be with someone who is just so into you. I see it all the time. So why is it that I can’t feel that way? It’s kind of a sick feeling when half the time you feel entangled in love and then the other half you feel like you’re never going to be that person who makes them feel genuinely interested in your opinions, your beliefs, and your life. Being me just doesn’t cut it anymore. I don’t even know what I’m doing. I just have a feeling that I’m never going to be that person no matter how much I care. I’m never going to be the reason to motivate someone. No matter how much emotion is behind the words I say, they always sound empty to someone else. This is something I will never understand because they’re afraid to hurt my feelings. Of course they’re going to say, “noo, you do motivate me. I know you care about me so much,” but it’s never believable. Actions make it believable. I’ve seen what it’s like for two people to truly make each other feel the most comfortable, the most secure, and the most trusted. I want that so badly.

10:57 pm, BY lisaplvu[2 notes]


So fucking immature.

12:14 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]

Don’t be fooled. What people don’t realize is that I’m never smiling on the inside.

Don’t be fooled. What people don’t realize is that I’m never smiling on the inside.

03:16 pm, BY lisaplvu[1 note]